George Carlin Quotes Government : "Most of the government wants to control information and language so that it can control you. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. You know how I define the economic and social classes in this country? The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. I like it when a flower or a little tuft of grass grows through a crack in the concrete. " George Carlin Quotes "Most of the country was founded by slave owners so they could be free. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. What really ought to be said after one of these so-called tragedies is, Let the scarring begin.George Carlin,When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? We would love to hear your thoughts, so dont be shy and comment below! Please dont forget to subscribe to ourRSS-feedor followInspirationfeedonTwitter,Google+,andFacebook! 4. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. return null; When you are born in America, you get a front row seat. You know what they ought to do with churches? Life is not measured by the number of breath we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. Enjoy! Each one of them has an entire hologram of the universe somewhere within them. George Carlin, 34. Laugh until you gasp for breath. George Carlin, 3. Weve added years to life, not life to years. George Carlin, 6. American 4. They own you. So, we must be clear about our expectations for government and its role in our lives. You know why? return cookiePair[1]; - George Carlin profile quotes. Goalcast inspires the world through stories. })(); var stylesheet = document.createElement("link"); His critical thinking shines on stage and opens your eyes to modern-day problems that most folks are oblivious to. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. he must of been a brilliant man mostly misunderstood by most people wish i would of met him in person one on one, 51 Best John Muir Quotes On Nature, Mountains, Trees, 50 To Kill A Mockingbird Atticus Quotes With Page Numbers, Happy Birthday Nephew Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Daughter Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Good Morning Happy Monday Images With Quotes, Wishes, Cute & Romantic Happy Birthday Love Images For Him, Her, Happy Birthday Dog Images With Quotes For Your Puppy, Happy Birthday Niece Images With Wishes, Messages, Quotes, Depression Quotes Images | Feeling Sad Pictures, Wallpaper, Happy Birthday Son Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Husband Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages For Hubby, Good Morning Quotes Images To Make Your Day Beautiful. The people are fucked." George Carlin "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. They own you. 3. "Laugh often, long and loud. Its never just a game when youre winning. George Carlin, 7. The Grammy-Award-winning star of 14stand-up comedy specials on HBO taught us the power of words and how a person can use humor as a weapon. In America, anyone can become president. We havent tried that for a while. George Carlin. And armbands. He was the second onComedy Centrals list of top 10 American comedians in 2004, posthumously awarded theMark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, and ranked second in number on the list of the 50 best stand-up comedians of all time by Rolling Stonemagazine in 2017. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. George Carlin, 37. Inspirational George Carlin Quotes 1. Save the planet! Everybodys going to save something now. George Carlin. And far from staying to the safer path, he leapt time and again past the cliff of common wisdom, in the hopes of rattling us into questioning the way we live. function isShowingBuyableFeatures() { There is only a short pause before the next horrifying event. I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. George Carlin Quotes Government George Carlin American Comedian born on May 12, 1937, died on June 22, 2008 George Denis Patrick Carlin was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor, and author. " Forget the politicians. It will not be with jack-boots. Its so fuckin heroic.George Carlin, The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.George Carlin, If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?George Carlin, I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. George Carlin, 39. 125 George Carlin Quotes 1. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. George Carlin, 70. After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 54 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves (wikipedia). After all, he was one of the most successful comedians of all time! Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear themusic. throw new Error("could not load device-specific stylesheet : " + err.message); Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. George Carlin, 14. Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. George Carlin, Dont just teach your children to readTeach them to question what they read.Teach them to question everything.George Carlin, How can He be perfect? // Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. #government. window.Mobvious = {}; The people are fucked.George Carlin, A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed.George Carlin, Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.George Carlin, I think I am, therefore, I am I think.George Carlin, Everyone smiles in the same language.George Carlin, People who say they dont care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they dont care what people think.George Carlin, Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers. At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. George Carlin, 10. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. I started this website because I wanted to help people like you to maximize their potential and achieve their dreams. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. George Carlin, 46. Tax them. He loves you. function(a9, a, p, s, t, A, g) { The quality of our thoughts and ideas can only be as good as the quality of our language. George Carlin, 25. They own everything. if (sourcesToHideBuyFeatures[i] == source) Like the boogie man. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Are these people kidding? The late great comedian George Carlin has many great quotes about life and society, here are some of them. The planet is fine. gads.type = "text/javascript"; If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. George Carlin, 73. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. } A Death! googletag.pubads().setTargeting("grsession", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); When he is not writing in his favorite coffee shop, Igor spends most of his time reading, traveling, producing house music, and capturing light with his camera. They never mention that part to us, do they? George Carlin, 50. I love individuals. 3. Its only a piece of cloth. George Carlin, 75.The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful of insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. [.] Let me know in the comments below and please share this post. [CDATA[ Some people see things that are, and ask, why? } The planet is fine. Laugh often, long and loud. pubID: '3211', adServer: 'googletag', bidTimeout: 4e3, params: { aps_privacy: '1YN' } Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. var ue_t0=window.ue_t0||+new Date(); Dont look for it. The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin, 83.Theres a reason education sucks, and its the same reason it will never ever ever be fixed. var cookie = cookies[i]; Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. George Carlin, 4. You and I are not in the big club. He was an American standup comedian. stylesheet.rel = "stylesheet"; Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days Ive stayed alive. My motto: Fuck Hope! George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, If everyone in the world sat quietly at the same time, closed their eyes and concentrated as hard as they could on peace and goodwill, all the killing and cruelty in the world would continue. My mind doesnt work that way, I got this real moron thing I do, its called thinking and Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions I have certain rules I live by. Its never just a game when youre winning.George Carlin, If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrheadoes that mean that 1 enjoys it?George Carlin, Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?George Carlin, Religion is like a pair of shoes..Find one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes.George Carlin, Religion is just mind control. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. George Carlin, 45. Goalcast is an inspiring community for achievers dedicated to helping you improve all aspects of your life. Electricity is really just organized lightning. George Carlin, 20. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. George Carlin, 62. If you enjoyed the following article we humbly ask you to comment, and help us spread the word! "Never argue with an idiot. Some people dream of things that never were, and ask, why not? You dont. George Carlin was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, after he passed away that year at the age of 71. 8 George Carlin Quotes On Death That Will Make You Think! Igor is a SEO specialist, designer, and freelance writer. Nothing changed.George Carlin, Well, if crime fighters fight crime and firefighters fight fires, what do freedom fighters fight?George Carlin, I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. Here we are sharing a collection of George Carlin quotes on religion, government, and life for you to think deeply about the things you have never done before. Comedian Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. The people are fucked." George Carlin tags: funny , humanity , humor 8709 likes Like Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist. George Carlin, 26. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("signedin", "false"); Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. 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Its all very confusing.George Carlin, People are wonderful. //]]>. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. I hate groups of people. Beneath George Carlins biting sarcasm and razor-sharp wit lay a heartfelt indignation at the injustices he observed in the world around him. , And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. George Carlin, 49. // page settings } catch (err) { } else { I think the life cycle is all backwards. }("apstag", window, document, "script", "//c.amazon-adsystem.com/aax2/apstag.js"); "Events.SushiEndpoint": "https://unagi.amazon.com/1/events/com.amazon.csm.csa.prod", This is what we have to offer. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You have owners. I think that speaks for itself. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("resource", "author_22782"); BAM! He made us notice the things we never did before in the form of his humor and this world will forever be grateful for this brilliant mind. What are your favorite George Carlin quotes? But there is an I in independence, individuality, andintegrity. George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. People who say they dont care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they dont care what people think. George Carlin, 28. Laugh until you gasp for breath.George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.George Carlin, Honesty may be the best policy, but its important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.George Carlin, People always tell me Have a nice day. Well what if I dont want to? Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save the snails. 2023 Inspirationfeed. Enjoy! The table is tilted, folks. Every person you look at; you can see the universe in their eyes, if you're really looking. }); And when you suspend your individual beauty you also give up a lot of your humanity. Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends, George Carlin (2002). Soon enough youll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, You show me a lazy prick whos lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and Ill show you a guy whos not causing any trouble. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, I have lots of ideas. Teach them to question everything. there's no such thing as rights. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Did you enjoy this article? The only country that could invade America is America! Thats exactly what I want you to think. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. }, George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Whether you agree with him or not, George Carlins views on government are definitely worth considering. If you burn the flag, youre burning the flag for what you perceive to be the bad things the country has done. They should be more vivid. // What Channel Is Comedy Central On Xfinity, Henderson Silver Knights Salaries, Articles G